~The purpose of Change~

Even when years seem to go by with nothing much changing, things continue to change all around us....& in us...
Even when we're not purposely, consciously changing, we change, we grow, we continue to become more of who we really are...it's like when you meet someone older, & talk for awhile, you can see all they've learned, but still see the little kid in them!
We're always who we always were, but still, we change. Some fight this fact, some exaggerate this fact, but nothing changes this fact.
I look back & can see that some things I thought would never change are different. I can tell that, when I wasn't paying attention, I grew. I realize now that with time came a maturity in how I handle change I never had in my youth.
How I handle my weight, & food, for example, is different. I never used to want to eat in front of others because of previous experiences, looks, comments of others judging, saying hurtful things....even if what I was eating was very healthy...because of my obesity...like their comments & looks were as if they were thinking I shouldn't have been eating at all!
In fact, a boyfriend once said to me in a drunken moment of candor, "Why don't you just stop eating till you've dropped 100 pounds!" (At a party in front of everyone, embarrassed by their learning of my size, though it never seemed to bother him previously...)
And women can be far crueler than men with this, sad to say! But I've come to realize that their own insecurities, & fear of gaining weight, was staring them in the face when they observed me... ...there have been studies done where they ask young girls (in KINDERGARTEN, I believe it was!) if they'd rather be fat or... {fill in the blank...sick, poor, ugly!} & they almost ALWAYS chose anything but fat!
I remember being shocked that one of the questions was "Would you rather not have a mom, or be fat?" & STILL they'd give up their own mother rather than carry extra weight around!!! Aside from the possible damage done to even be asked (& compelled to consider, & answer) such a question, I was sooooo grieved that the brainwashing of our culture has so permeated even our youngest members that they would give up their most loved one rather than be what they've been taught to hate!
I've never felt the way many children clearly do now, but it's not hard to understand, given our culture's constant messages about bodies...having carried more weight than my peers from at least 11 years of age, {whether a little or a lot...the numbers on the scale gradually climbed...} I've just naturally developed such compassion on those struggling to be free from obesity, as I have been for most of my life...
And one day, when I've climbed out of this fat suit I've worn so long, I will always carry a little pamphlet I'm writing around with me, ready to give to anyone I'm led to, to share my story, with info on real, whole, raw foods, & how I was set free, with links to the best sites to learn more, with a recommended reading list, & encouragement to allow others to be there for them along the way...
...it will also contain my e-mail address, & this blog address, if they'd like to get in touch, whenever they're ready to begin...because the truth is, change is inevitable...& happens more effectively when we share the journey openly, with compassion, kindness & truth...no longer hiding, or in shame, feeling hopeless, like it'll never change!
Raw works! It's the God-given CURE for obesity, & I know it WILL work for anyone who is willing to follow through consistantly...as I'm learning to do...and yes, as I change, & the things that needed changing in my life are finally being transformed & healed....
{...because I stopped resisting change!}