September 09, 2009

~Changes Unfolding, New Beginnings~

Soooo much has been happening, so rapidly...the biggest change (aside from a major move!) has been that I was just diagnosed with Diabetes!
It has undone every last resistance I've ever had to STAYING raw, & I am now back at 100% (as close as possible), & juicing & smoothies daily, & beginning to exercise daily, as well...
As much as this blog is like an old friend, with all the changes happening, I needed to begin again, & so I've started a new blog, focussed, at first, on reversing this diabetes, & then, when I've accomplished that, with God's help, I'm going to get free of EVERYTHING I've been hindered by, health-wise!
So here's the new blog...C'mon over for a visit!
Slightly different format, but still my journey unfolding!

July 08, 2009

~New beginnings, Changes Unfolding ~

I've relocated, mostly for the purposes of having the support I need to totally re-gain my health, with the consistancy I've been struggling with...& already, things are happening that are confirming to me that this truly is where God has led me, & that He has opened these doors.
I've been here 8 days now, & in the first 6, I shed 9 pounds...(can't wait to weigh in again, have been almost 100% raw most days, & will soon be EVERY day!) I've been swimming, going out almost daily, moving & walking more, trying to stay on a morning schedule, & am getting unpacked & setting up my little gym, & my quilting studio (I decided to sleep in the den & make my master bedroom the studio I've wanted for years!)
The biggest change here is that getting to the grocery store consistantly (& maybe even the Farmer's Market!) & the health food store once in awhile is no longer going to be a weekly struggle, & so that ends the struggle to stay raw!
No more living off the SAD food from the food bank half the month, due to financial more only getting out of the house once or twice a week!
I also hope to be driving by the fall, after over 8 years of not driving!
I'll also be going swimming regularily, including water aerobics classes, & have access to a full gym, indoor walking track, & other regular physical activites to start being CONSISTANTY active, something I've struggled with over the years, but know it's time to get serious about...
My first goal is to shed 25-30 pounds this month! With 9 gone already by the 6th, I'm on my way!
I will do this by:
~ Staying 100% raw (I've been 60-90% since arriving, but am ready & my kitchen is prepared now for 100%, as of today! Here we go! Day one, again!)
~ Gradually increasing my exercise, (so the FM doesn't flare up like it always does when I begin getting active, due to overdoing it!I'm still recovering from all the packing, the move, & the unpacking, & both my hands are still totally numb (CTS) so I'm having to pace myself this time, but swimming is something I can do without too much pain, so I'm planning on making it the main source of activity at first...)
~ Getting on a proper sleep schedule, ensuring I begin getting enough sleep finally (something I know has contributed to my weight gain, & my struggle to shed these extra pounds I'm so weary of carrying!)
~ Keeping enough raw food around, bringing it with me on outings, & trying new raw recipes weekly. Also, daily green smoothies, juicing when I have enough produce, & gradually incorporating detox & mini-fasts into my routines, as led, & able.
Well, that's it for now...thanks for checking in on me, for those of you still reading, & Howdy, & welcome to my blog, for the newcomers!
I'll be a lot more consistant now, with my new commitments...maybe even little daily updates! (Especially if the scale continues to reflect the changes I'm making favorably! Yes, health is my untimate goal, but that will only come with the shedding of this extra weight, so it, too, is in my focus!)

May 22, 2009

~Sweet, Simple Smoothies~

My friend Shannon went to hear Victoria Boutenko speak awhile back, & shared a few things she'd gleaned from her talk...(which she summarazed well on her site) but one thing that stuck, that I've applied is to keep smoothies 3 ingredients...fruit, greens & I've been doing that, cuttin' out all the extraneous stuff, & have really been enjoying them, digesting them easier, & been more satisfied by them....which suprised me, cuz I used to really like putting 10 things in them & trying to identify each individual taste, as well as putting in extra things for health (flax, etc.)...
Anyways, just wanted to share these two sites with you, & a quick update...
...been about 75% raw, struggling a bit at dinners, but am still determined to return to 100%, am using the treadmill, lovin' the sunshine, & am still waiting for produce prices to working on getting a garden set up, if we don't move...need to decide soon...
..the scales have only budged a pound or two at a time, but it's been slooooooow, compared to when I'm I keep on keepin' on, determined to do what I know I need to do...
...I even dehydrated some sweet potato fries last night, gotta go try 'em now!!
Enjoy the sunshine!!!

April 28, 2009

The Veiw of the mountains from this valley I've chosen...

I've been praying more lately about the place I've been lingering in with my health.
I see now that I'm in a valley, & am beginning to see much clearer how the Lord is allowing,
even orchestrating these stops & starts I have struggled through in order to continue the deeper work He's been doing in my life, & in my walk with Him.
It's all, still, more about dying to self, choosing to live in the spirit rather than led by the flesh, & the difficulties with consistancy I've continued having are tied in with my ongoing resistance to living a continually crucified life.
This is a sin that I have struggled with in every area of my life, I confess,
{though I have gained victory over it in some areas, by the grace of God...}
He has shown me, clearly, how to care for this temple of His Holy Spirit, but I have wavered,
not fully, whole-heartedly obeying, & I know we reap what we sow...
...whatever the almost doesn't even really matter what the reasons are,
(...though He reveals them as they need to be exposed, healed, released...)
All that truly matters, in the long run, is am I going to have eyes to see, ears to hear?
And am I willing to die to even this?
Or am I going to wallow, & allow the past to hinder my obedience?
Will I make more excuses, & continue the struggle...?
SELF would have me focus in on all the reasons...
...but He's leading me to just lay them all down, at the foot of the cross, & repent.
(I know that He would not ask something of me
that He hasn't made provision for me to do, I know...)
Philippians 3:12-14 Pressing Toward the Goal
"Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected;but I press on,
that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me.
Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do,
forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead,
I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus."
I remember, again, what a brother once told me,
that when we are 'struggling' with something, it is always
(whatever the 'other' reasons)
because God is trying to remove something from our lives,
& we are trying to hold on...
...I know what to do to have health again...
(I could write books about it by now!)
...& I know what He has called me to...
...but I begin, then falter...I walk awhile, then end up in a ditch, again...
...but in retrospect, each time I do, I glance back fro a moment
& see that I have walked further than last time...
...& I stay for a shorter duration in the mud & danger...
...& by His grace I am a wee bit stronger, able one more time to climb back out & press on... Father, help me over these brambles!
Help me climb back up to the light of day,
to the light of the truth you've so graciously revealed to me
about my part in my health's restoration,
so I can serve you with ALL of my strength,
as never before, no longer weak & limited by my flesh,
but truly living the crucified life you call your disciples to walk,
wholeheartedly devoted to your purposes,
disciplined in my living in every area,
able to go wherever you send me,
prepared to endure the hardness of the days to come
without being hindered by the weaknesses of my flesh
that I myself have caused.
Without you, I can do NOTHING,
but with you, Lord, I know I can do ALL things!!!

April 20, 2009

My Own Personal New Year!

I wrote a poem once, a long time ago, that I can't find started out...

Your birthday is your own personal new year,a point in time between then....& now....
A place to look back on as a change that began in a moment of time,
a time to reflect on the time your life here on earth began with your birth,
& led you to now..................
~Yesterday, I celebrated another point in time that re-sets the clock,
on another anniversary of my birth...
...& it's been one of the most gently profound & intense turning points of my far....
The time has come for full speed ahead!
No more false starts,
starting & stopping over & over,
beginning, & then, for a variety of reasons,
withdrawing from the new direction I've been heading...

...I'm fully surrendered now to where it's clearly leading!
There is only starting over,
& allowing myself the healing found in no longer hindering my direction,
no longer choosing to linger in ditches,
rather than remaining steadfast on the narrow path...
....if I fall in one, from this day forward,
I'll just climb right on back out,
or reach up my hands to the Father to lift me from the shadows & pain
I've inflicted on myself again...
{...only He understands the deepest reasons why...}
And just now, on the beginning of the Waltons, as they speak of spring's arrival,
even as Hitler was filling the world with the coldness of his evil intentions & actions,
the mountain was coming alive with the spring's glorious beauty & wonder of new life,
& John boy began the show with his usual insight & summary of the story to follow...

"There was the struggle for Mary-Ellen to emerge from her painful winter
(her husband was killed at Pearl Harbour)
& she was emerging into a new spring of her own..."

"That is exactly how I feel....every year on my birthday, but this year, more than most!
This has been a very loooong, painful winter......making spring all the sweeter!!!

Celebrate EVERY new beginning you've been given!
Each dawn is a birth, a day to begin again...
...a birthday is a gift of another year to learn, grow & change...
...growing older is a blessing that the Lord has pre-arranged!"

...& renew a steadfast spirit within me..."

April 13, 2009

Ten Days at a time, One Day at a Time....

I've been praying for months now, on & off, about something I read about waaaaaaaay back, somewhere on someone's blog... was someone who was working on staying raw, as well as detoxing, & also shedding their excess weight...
...first they fasted ten days, then were 100% raw ten days...
...I believe that this is how the Lord wants me to spend the next 100 days...50 fasting, 50 days 100% raw, 10 days at a time...starting with fasting, to accelerate the detox I need in from the junk I've been eating, & also to prepare my flesh nature to stay raw 100% without struggle... mind & heart are prepared & committed, but my body has been rebelling a little...time to remind it that it ain't the boss!!!
I've been wanting to return to regular fasting for awhile, but have hesitated due to concerns about how thin my hair has become (fasting for longer periods can cause/accelerate this)...
...I haven't been able to fast for longer periods of time for many years, but remember that I only shed hair from it before after some 3 week fasts I did, & quite a bit after some 40 days ones (water only) ten days feels totally feasible from that perspective....
In the past, I actually found it easier to fast than to eat with moderation & self-control, but now that those issues are healed in me, it's only been the fact of my physical limitations that have hindered my ability to return to to fasting...

{...yet I know that fasting is extremely healing......even the Bible states this...}

...yet much as I need more physical healing/detoxing, my main & first purposes are spiritual...there are many things I need to be praying about, & fasting enables me to more effectively put all else aside, & draw near to the Lord, & seek Him more wholeheartedly for His will...
These are my favorite verses (a whole chapter, actually) on fasting, & contains the reference to fasting bringing healing...

Fasting that Pleases God

“Cry aloud, spare not; Lift up your voice like a trumpet; Tell My people their transgression, And the house of Jacob their sins.
Yet they seek Me daily, And delight to know My ways,
As a nation that did righteousness, And did not forsake the ordinance of their God.

They ask of Me the ordinances of justice; They take delight in approaching God.
‘ Why have we fasted,’ they say, ‘and You have not seen?
Why have we afflicted our souls, and You take no notice?’
“ In fact, in the day of your fast you find pleasure,
And exploit all your laborers.

Indeed you fast for strife and debate, And to strike with the fist of wickedness.
You will not fast as you do this day, To make your voice heard on high.
Is it a fast that I (God) have chosen, A day for a man to afflict his soul?

Is it to bow down his head like a bulrush, And to spread out sackcloth and ashes?
Would you call this a fast, And an acceptable day to the LORD?

“ Is this not the fast that I (GOD!) have chosen:
To loose the bonds of wickedness,To undo the heavy burdens, To let the oppressed go free, And that you break every yoke?

Is it not to share your bread with the hungry,
And that you bring to your house the poor who are cast out;
When you see the naked, that you cover him,
And not hide yourself from your own flesh?
Then your light shall break forth like the morning,
Your healing shall spring forth speedily,
And your righteousness shall go before you;
The glory of the LORD shall be your rear guard.
Then you shall call, and the LORD will answer;
You shall cry, and He will say, ‘Here I am.’

“ If you take away the yoke from your midst,
The pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness,
If you extend your soul to the hungry And satisfy the afflicted soul,
Then your light shall dawn in the darkness,
And your darkness shall be as the noonday.

The LORD will guide you continually, And satisfy your soul in drought,
And strengthen your bones; You shall be like a watered garden,
And like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.

Those from among you Shall build the old waste places;
You shall raise up the foundations of many generations;
And you shall be called the Repairer of the Breach,
The Restorer of Streets to Dwell In.

“ If you turn away your foot from the Sabbath,
From doing your pleasure on My holy day,
And call the Sabbath a delight, The holy day of the LORD honorable,
And shall honor Him, not doing your own ways,
Nor finding your own pleasure, Nor speaking your own words,
Then you shall delight yourself in the LORD;
And I will cause you to ride on the high hills of the earth,
And feed you with the heritage of Jacob your father.
The mouth of the LORD has spoken.”
Isaiah 58

Wow! Isn't that beautiful, powerful, inspiring, & convicting, all at once?!!?
I'll be feasting on the Word of God, & His powerful, transforming Holy presence!
{Even better & more fulfilling than even the best raw food!!!}
I'm so excited for the dawning of the new day, & this new beginning He's led me to!!!
What are you called to do the next 100 days?
Wanna join me?
Pray about it!

April 07, 2009

The Power of Choosing, the Blessing of Free Will...& food "addictions"...

Free will...been thinkin' a lot about it lately, in relation to the raw food way of living...
I confess, the whole concept of addiction to various types of food has just never really sat well with me...
...yes, I realize there are addictive preservatives (especially potasium sorbate & sodium benzoate) in numerous processed foods, & I know that milk has an opiate-like substance in it that can cause addictive cravings, & that we often crave what we're allergic to...
...& yes, I know I was 'addicted' to chocolate for many years...(yet when I decide to give it up, & return to carob, it was a done deal...unless I choose to indulge again...which I rarely do, since realizing I have a strong sensitivity to caffeine...)
And I do realize that there are physical ramifications to what we eat, & how it affects us, in numerous ways......still, I struggle with the concept that we cannot control what we put in our mouths...
...mostly because, much as I have cravings, like anyone else, & much as I've struggled to stay raw for a long period of time, still, I know that each time I've 'broken raw', no matter how far along in my detox I was (...whether just starting, or much further along...) & the cravings & struggles that can come with that, it's ALWAYS happened due to a moment of choosing, of deciding to not honour my commitment to stay raw...
...I either choose to no longer eat the things my taste buds still like {& tell me I want!} that I know are harmful to me, & reap the benefits...
...or I make a decision to indulge, & deal with the consequences...( my health,on the scale, with discouragement, & how I feel about giving in again...)
No-one forces the food into my mouth, shopping cart, house, or body...nobody but me chooses to say yes to my flesh, rather than listen to what I've learned, & know now to be best for me...
...the deeper question seems to be, "Why do we do what we know hurts us?"
But sometimes the answer really is as simple as, "Cuz I WANTED to!!!"
{ Or, as the Bible says, "The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak!" }
I remember hearing an analogy once that lent me much strength in my spiritual walk, & my ability to discipline my flesh, & resist temptation... & lately, it's been on my mind & I've been able to apply it to my raw food journey.... here it is, maybe it'll help you strengthen your resolve to stay raw, as it is for me...
Picture 2 aggressive pitbulls in your back is all black, one is pure white...
...each day, when you feed them, you only throw out enough food to feed one...
...they'll fight over it, & struggle, & neither will ever get what they need...
...but if you choose one to feed, the other will eventually grow weaker, & die...
(Ok, you know I'd never do this with REAL dogs, right???!!??)
The spiritual implications are clear, regarding walking after the flesh, or after the spirit,which the Bible says wage war against each other...
...when I applied this to my changing lifestyle, I saw, again, how it all boils down to daily choosing to do what's right...when I "feed the black dog," then I will experience the strengthening of the part of me that wants to eat according to appetite & taste only, in the moment of hunger, seeking
things from food other than nourishment!

But when I "feed the white dog", I find myself willingly accepting that it'll take time to re-train my appetites, & that food is meant to nourish, & assist our body is doing what it's meant to do, & I willingly, gladly, easily put the things God made for food into my body, rather than the old things that no longer satisfy, {except momentarily}...

That is, I believe, how some just go 100% raw, & never look back, with few setbacks, & others go back & forth for's all about the will...
...when we feed the wrong dog, when we don't support ourselves 100% in our commitment to do what we know is best for us, & we go back & forth, we're weak sometimes, strong other times, depending on which dog we're feeding...
...we fluctuate because we haven't settled it yet...we want both health & cooked food...we want to eat what we want, & still don't fully accept the consequences...
(... enough to consistantly turn away from harmful things yet, at least!)
...for me, the key to overcoming has always been knowing that it's my choice of which dog to feed... to live, or live to eat...
...I want to LIVE! Not for food, not with failing health, not letting my appetites control me, but controlling them,& enjoying all the benefits of choosing LIFE!!!
When I accepted the current teaching that say that we struggle with staying raw because of food 'addictions',I started to feel powerless, helpless, like it would always be a struggle...
...yet the moment I return to accepting that I am the one in control of what I put in my body each day, (not my cravings, my appetites, my past eating habits, my brain or body chemistry, or some other outside power) then I am suddenly strengthened, & empowered to make choices that support my goals...
...& I am free from the consequences of thinking I have no choice, or can't change...
(...& most importantly, when I'm not feeling 'in control' enough to discipline my flesh, (like when I'm tired!) I turn to God, & ask His Holy Spirit dwelling in me to control me...& if I'm being sincere, He does!)
To me, it's quite similar to the difference between choosing to stop drinking, (as I've seen numerous people do overnight, {with God's help, even with heavy long-term drinking...} & calling yourself an alchoholic, even many years after ceasing from abusing themselves with alcohol...leaving them always fearful of going back to it, (& needing meetings to help them choose not to) thinking it has a power over them, though no-one ever forced them to drink...
(...& don't get me wrong, I realize things happen/change in brain chemistry with drugs & alcohol that can make quitting difficult, but I beleive it's still always a choice to continue, to return to something that is clearly causing harm...I believe the reasons are more internal/emotional (& spiritual) than physical, is what I mean...
...& yes, I know detoxing from drugs & alcohol can be horrible...but still, for those who are done with it, those who choose to stop, even if they need help, they succeed!
You can lead a horse to water, right?
But if they're not ready to change, to let go of self-destructive behaviour, it doesn't matter how many meetings or detox centers they go to...they have to want to be free more than they want the high...I believe it's the same with food...
...when you think you're powerless, you are...
...when you think you can't stop, you can't...
...when you think something outside of you controls you, it does...
...when you think food can control you, it does...
...& when you change your mind, & take full responsibility, (often requiring letting go of a victim mentality, forgiving, repenting & learning a new way to live!) you suddenly feel the weight of the reins in your hands that were there all along, but your hands were numb to...
...& you can begin to rein in what has been running wild,
as well as take off at a gallop where you've been stuck, walking in circles...
For those who believe differently, please know I don't write this in judgement...
...I'm just sharing what I've discovered is true for me!
It resonates in me, & continues to strengthen me by the day!
"So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed!" {John 8:36}
He is, He has, & He continues to...when I'm willing (an act of the will!) to be free!!!

April 04, 2009

Go visit the Sunny raw Kitchen!!!

I've rediscovered one of my favorite blogs today! & I need to tell you, it's SUCH an amazing gift to the raw community!
Do you know about it? it's called, "My Sunny Raw kitchen," & she (Carmella, another British Columbian!) just organized ALL her incredibly yummy recipes, so they're easier to access! She even sorted them into those that need a dehydrator, & those that don't!
{I'm so thankful today, Lord, for Spring Cleaning inspiration!}
OK, so here's the link, go check it out right now, you've gotta see it! Go ahead, I'll wait!
Isn't it phenomenal??? Doesn't it inspire you to go make something yummilicious & nutritious?!?!? If I wasn't so tired, tht's what I'd be doing right now!!!
But I can hear my pillow callin' my name, & I've been trying for eons to get back on a morning schedule, so I'm gonna listen to what my body is tellin' me & go sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!!!
Enjoy her wonderful site! & please tell her for me that I said Hi!

March 29, 2009


My birthday's coming! Though it's always been a bit of a sad day for me (I was affected deeply by things that have taken place on that day...the Oklahoma City bombing, Waco (& the death of all the branch Davidians, especially the 17 children...& other things...) but last year, the joy of celebrating began to return again, when Hannah threw me a suprise picnic (it was so cold we ate FAST & ran inside! but it was FUN!)
So this year, I have my old best friend I haven't seen in almost 8 years coming (for Easter, the week before, & staying until then...) & her & I & some of my local friends are all going out to my new best friend's house on the lake, & we're going to have a Raw Spa day! Raw lazagna, some raw side dishes, a big yummy salad, & some of Shannon's incredible chocolate fudge with a variety of toppings (nuts, raspberry sauces, etc.) & then we're going to do some natural spa things! (Avacado masques, strawberry astringents, steaming our mudd masques, foot massages, etc .) It's going to be so fun! Hannah's going to help me plan it all out, & I'm sooo looking forward to it!
Now if I can just stay 100% raw until then, & be past the detox stuff I've been experiencing! (Headaches, even migraines, not sleeping well, back pain, tummy stuff...& I haven't even been 100%...)
...& my goal is to shed at least 10 more pounds before then! That'll be my birthday gift to myself!

March 18, 2009

~The Call of the Raw~

I often hear the call of the wild...the yearning to go off into the forest, away from all but the beauty of God's creation, to climb mountains, to lay down in a field & watch the birds cross the sky, to sit by the ocean & let the sound of the waves wash over me...
...but now, I also hear the call of RAW...when I eat man-made imitation food, my body grumbles & sighs, expressing it's unmet needs, & I find myself daydreaming of a big salad, mangos, celery, blueberries, avacados, watermelon...
When I give my body what it truly wants, the cells of my body respond with an enthusiastic & loud "YES!!!" & I am in awe at how quickly my energy & strength increase!
Our cells are being replaced could we believe for even a moment that what we fuel them with doesn't really matter?!?!?!? It's a lie we've been told, & then tell ourselves, to justify eating for taste, not health, & for convenience, not the long-term consequences, & for 'value' (junk food IS cheap!), not the price we eventually pay!
When I'm hungry now, the call of RAW, whole, real food is what I most often hear...when I see food that doesn't truly nourish, it no longer looks appetizing in the same old way....yes, when I'm famished, it can still tempt me, but I'm beginning to listen on a deeper level to what my body is truly hungry for, & what truly satisfies...& the strength to say NO to fake, unhealthy food just comes so much easier, after allowing my body to experience the difference!
That's why I suggest people give raw, whole foods a chance...just do a 30 day challenge, & see how ALIVE you COULD be feeling ALL the time, if you're just willing to EAT TO LIVE, & NO LONGER LIVE TO EAT!!!
I'm realizing that this is similar to spiritual hunger...when I was wandering in the maze of Eastern Spirituality, exploring, & then immersing myself in New Age & occultic practices that I believed would feed & nourish my spirit, I was seeking truth, peace, hope, love, & I 'consumed' things that just didn't satisfy, & left me empty, & longing for more...(like processed food always does...) but when I finally surrendered to who God says He is, & how He revealed Himself, & allowed myself to enter into a relationship with Him through Jesus Christ, & acceptance of what He did on the cross, suddenly the difference, like night & day, left no room or reason to turn back!
The difference in EVERY aspect of my life when I eat raw, real whole foods & when I eat processed, man-made, high-fat/sugar/salt foods is also like night & day...
The Bible says to GLORIFY GOD IN YOUR BODY! How can I do that & tear down my health at the same time? I no longer can..."And you shall know the truth, & the truth shall SET YOU FREE!"
Pursuing a better way to live, to eat, to take care of these temples of the Holy Spirit doesn't have to be carnal, worldly-minded, vain or obsessive, or 'another gospel' to be preached...& we don't need to chase after youth or beauty in order to seek health, strength, healing so we have the ability to fulfill what we were put here on earth to do!
It's all a matter of perspective, balance, & wisdom...& for me, now, of obedience...

March 08, 2009

My faith is NO LONGER in Doctors...for ANYTHING!!! (A rebuke of my self for making excuses for not consistantly staying raw!)

This week I'm watching my favorite Aunt die of cancer that has gone undiagnosed until a few weeks ago, after over a year of going to Dr's for answers, getting tested, & having them totally missing it, {though she lost a lot of weight & her health was cleary fading...}
I never knew until days ago that she's finally been diagnosed a few weeks ago with being so full of advanced cancer they can do nothing, & it's just a matter of days now before her time here on earth is done.
It ANGERS me!!! & yes, it's my love for her that is reacting so intensely to her situation, but also, I know that it's also seeing the need to face & let go of the last remnant in me of ANY confidence at all in the medical system...
...& even knowing that chemo & radiation may prolong someone's time, still, I grieve over the fact that that level of posioning & destruction also make their last days painful, & in many ways worse than if they had just died without it, as my Aunty Barb is now facing...
...though I faced cancer last year, & was being pressured to go that route, I know now I never would!
So again, here I am facing another wake-up call...'s time to TAKE RESPONSIBILITY, on EVERY level, for our own health!!!
We cannot learn all we've learned, see our own responsibility, & then continue to ignore our responsibility for our own health, & keep looking to the medical community for answers, in naive, hopeful childlike faith!
Doctors miss things, misdiagnose, misprescribe, over-prescribe, mix prescriptions that shouldn't be mixed, & prescribe things ALL THE TIME that can do permanent harm or kill you!! We know that it happens EVERY SINGLE DAY!!!
{Ever watch commercials for drugs, with all their warnings?!?!?}
They mess up surgeries, & hospital stays leave you exposed to infections that antibiotics can't even touch anymore, infections that can maim or kill you!
Things will only change (for us individually, as well as as a nation!) when we face & accept that the medical system {& what it offers} has MAJOR limitations that we try to minimize or even ignore in our dependence on them for FAR too many areas of our lives that are actually ultimately UP TO US!!!
(& God, of course!)
Yes, I realize they have their place.......yes, they do save lives......but when we KNOW that SO MUCH of what we go through is preventable, & diet or lifestyle related (caused!) then how can we just blindly go on depending on the undependable?!?!?
Why are we so unwilling ( & call it "unable") to discipline our flesh, our appetites, our carnality that has gotten us so unhealthy in the first place, finally just facing our lazy, self-centered flesh nature & JUST DO IT!?!?!?
{I'm speakin' to myself here, not pointing the finger at anyone......I'm just so weary of the yo-yoing of transitioning, rather than victory......& of the consequences this has brought to my health & entire life!}
When we know that eating raw, organic whole foods keeps us so much healthier, & that even when we do have health issues, it helps us heal from things so much more effectively, & when we know the benefits to our immune system, to our health on every level, why would we return like lambs to the slaughter to fake food, based only on taste, habit, emotions, & not on life-giving substance???
Why are we willing to spend so much money (especially compared to other nations!) on pampering & entertaining our flesh, yet not on feeding it pure, whole, organic foods?(Even if it means we can't afford the other things we want!)
Why do we spend our time doing things that actually wear us out & tear us down,but not on things that build us up???
Why do we spend hours a day online, or watching tv, or on the phone,(or all of the above!!) then still say we have no time to exercise???
(Even knowing the energy to exercise often only comes when we actually begin exercising?!?!?)Even knowing eating the things God made for food will lead to a healthy, long life, soooo many just live on in addiction to habits destroying them, hoping they won't be one of the ones to suffer too long, or experience the diseases related to abuse of the body... if it were all by CHANCE, a Russian roulette of sorts that has nothing much to do with their actions...
...I refuse to waste waste one more day riding the fence!!!
Or one more year, or MONTH, WEEK, OR DAY going back & forth!!!
I hereby take FULL & TOTAL responsibilty for my health, from this day on for the rest of my life!
I will depend on GOD ONLY for ALL of my health needs, & in His ability to guide me, & help me do what I now KNOW to do, {& I will continue to also trust Him for supernatural healing when that is the only option, as with my inflammatory breast cancer last year that His miraculous power removed from my body!}
...& I will NOT hold onto the thought in the back of my mind that a Doctor, medicine, hospitals, etc. are NEEDED for me to be healthy & live a life that glorifies Him!!!
I will only turn to them for diagnosis, {only if God leads me to!} in order to gain knowledge of what to research & focus on healing naturally, the way He created our self-healing bodies to function!
Please understand that, yes, the passion welling up in me over this is intense...
...but it also comes with a deep calm, a peace that comes with a much deeper level of surrender than before...
...If you haven't experienced this already, may you know it, too!
...I wish so much my sweet, red-headed, voice-of-an-angel songbird Aunty Barb had.
I pray my other friends & relatives, & all those I'm led to, will allow me to speak this truth into their lives, too, when my life & health fully reflects what I know, so they can observe the transformation it has brought me, Hannah, & our future, & see that it could also be theirs!
James 4:14-15
"For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.
Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.”

February 28, 2009

Another New Beginning, time for re-committing!

(Taken from a post I wrote at Rawfu, in part...)
I never really know how to classify where I'm at...
..."fallin' off the raw wagon" now looks totally different than it used to...
...I still eat more produce than I ever used to, but I still only feel totally ALIVE & like I'm moving towards total health when I'm 100% raw!
Last nite, I got DETERMINED, totally recommitted, & formulated a plan to get back to 100% raw!

Here's my plan:
~ I made a DAILY weigh-in chart & a commitment to weigh in in front of Hannah each morning! (She's my Bob'n'Jillian combined! & my little raw food chef, too!)
(cuz for me, getting on that scale each morning & seeing a drop at least every other day keeps me goin'! (For my health issues to be resolved, I NEED to shed weight!) I've gained back some of the 60+ lbs I've lost & cannot allow that number on the scale to go any higher! I'm feelin' it, believe me!)
This works 4 me cuz I have so much to lose, & as soon as I go 100% it starts comin' off! When you don't have as much to lose, it could be discouraging, but you could make a chart for however often you're planning to weigh -in, (if you are) & write it out for at least a few months in advance...this tells your brain that you're in it for the long haul, & there's no goin' off course in a week or so...
...every time I wrote my weight in (each morning) the last time I re-committed, I saw that chart & it re-affirmed my goals, & the weight-loss goal I'd projected reaching...& it worked last time, so here I go again!~
~ CLEAN OUT THE CUPBOARDS & FRIDGE! Hannah agreed to do at least one month 100% with me, so there's NOTHING IN THE HOUSE to tempt us!
~ Find at least one new recipe to try each week, based on ingredients I already have, & each shopping trip, try new produce, & have a list of things to get that will offer more variety (4 example, I need to start making dehydrated bread/crackers, but haven't, cuz haven't had the ingredients! It would definately help with transitioning & stayijng raw!)
~ Set clear, defined exercise goals, & where I write down my food intake for the day, I also write down the kind of physical activity I did each day. I set weekly goals as well. (First week, exercise half an hour to 45 minutes a day...each week, increase by 15 minutes minimum. (I have FM, & have to go gradually or I don't wanna move for DAYS after over-doing it!)
~ Plan social activities that either don't include food, or eat first, bring my own food, & be prepared to say, 'No thanks!" (Often this is just a matter of my really notices/cares whether you eat or not, if you don't make a big deal out of it...) For the first few weeks of getting back on track, in the past, I've just not gone places I KNEW I'd be tempted, but I'm stronger now, & can go & say no if my mind is geared up, & I'm not starving when I arrive!
~STAY HYDRATED!!! Definately NOT letting myself get dehydrated helps!!!! & when I eat cooked, I tend to not drink as much water, so often the first thing I need to do to STAY RAW is increase my water, carrying it with me, keeping it at my desk, etc...drinking water right before you eat, or with food actually dilutes your digestive's better to drink half an hour to an hour before a meal, & in between meals. When I'm hydrated, I don't overeat, & my cravings definately decrease...& the weight comes off faster!
~ Most importantly for me, I pray daily for strength, self-control (a fruit of the Spirit in the Bible (meaning evidence that the Holy Spirit is working in our lives, & that we are led by the Spirit, & not the flesh-nature), & I repent for gluttony, laziness, & recieve His grace & mercy & a new beginning when I turn from self-destructive ways & ask Him to help me obey my theme scripture:
1 Corinthians 6:19-20..."What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit which is in you, which you have of God, and you are not your own?For you are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's."
I belong to Him, & it doesn't glorify Him that my health & weight are so hindered by what I've chosen to fuel my temple with (rather than what He created for food/fuel!)
So for me, it's an act of obedience, & devotion, out of my love for Him, & my desire to more effectively serve Him & others with my life, & in this body that motivates me to get back to doing what I know works to RAWstore me to health!

Most of all I've learned that I need to just MAKE UP MY MIND!!! THEN the rest all falls into place!
Last night, I finally came to the place again COMPLETELY of knowing that IT'S TIME for 100% again! Spring is right around the corner, then another HOT summer!
I talked with Hannah about all I want to do with her this summer, & I know I can't do those things with her if I can't handle moving around out in the heat! (like last summer!& the last 5 or 6!)
We discussed some mutual goals, & some plans for rewards for sticking to it, & we talked about doing a Raw Picnic/Luncheon at church for my birthday (on a Sunday in April) & where I want to be by then, & we realized together how much more energy we both had when 100% raw, how much better we felt in every way, how much we've both changed since before the holidays, & sinse going back to half raw, half cooked...& how we want to get back to how we were, & STAY there!
We also discussed getting to the farmer's market WEEKLY somehow, & getting the storage room cleared out so we can get to the cold room for our summer produce!& again I decided that when I can't afford raw, or keep enough produce in the house, that is when I'm meant to fast...NOT eat the canned stuff or Mac'n'cheeze from the food bank, or buy Ichiban noodles cuz it's really cheap! (A meal (2 pkg's) for 50 cents! With 50 grams of fat, a ton of sodium, & msg., a chemical feast & white flour! YUCK! Never again!!!)
NO MORE EXCUSES FOR ME!!!! I'm, once again, READY TO BE 100% RAW!!!
{Does all this sound familiar? I know I've been here before, but yet I know I've been progressing, learning, changing, & am more ready now than I've ever been to "Just do it!"}

February 25, 2009

I need your prayers!!! (& support! & suggestions!)

I'm crawling out of the dregs of cooked & even worse, FAST food (why do they call it that when, really, it slows ya down soooo much!????!) & my body is craving & NEEDING to get raw again!
I've been trying for weeks to return to the life-sustaining way of eating I've been so thankful to discover, but only ever make it partway thru the day raw, or at the most, a day or so raw, then give in to the cravings I need to begin all over again to conquer!!! I need your prayers!!!!
I feel like I'm back at the beginning, though I know I've come a long way, & learned much along the way...still, the cravings, especially for bread, which I've NEVER been one to crave, have gotten so strong it's hard to get anything done until I yeild to them! (Invasion of the body snatchers???!!??)
I want to just do a fast, some detoxing, something, ANYTHING, to accelerate the process again...but have so much to do each day, I won't have much time to rest, like I feel is best with fasting/detoxing... please pray for me to have wisdom & direction in how to proceed, & the self-control to get my flesh cucified once again in this area of my life!
Is anyone still even reading this? ***waves feebly***

January 29, 2009


Ok, time has been FLYING by lately, & it seems a month takes about a WEEK to go by!!!
I've been easing back into 100% raw after the holidaze...we've been dealing with extreme cold lately (especially in our little basement suite!) & have been struggling with FEELING cold ALL the time! But I've decided to allow myself hot herbal tea whenever I need to warm up, & that's helped a lot with making me able to eat a cold meal!
I've been able to order some bulk organic produce again (for the first time in months!) & so we have TONS of apples, grapefruits, sweet potatoes, (fro chips in the dehydrator! & Hannah loves 'em baked!) & I've been making blender applesauce LOTS! It's so incredibly yummy! Here's the basic recipe...(from my blog at RawFu...)
Fill blender with apples, & any other fruit you like (mostly apples, though! Apricots, peaches, blueberries or other berries, bananas go really well...)
Add some water, maybe a fourth of the blender......add some greens if you like, or green powder......throw in some cinnamon, ginger, nutmeg, whatever you like... can even add a little vanilla...then blend, blend, blend!
{Then make another blender full, cuz the first one'll go real FAST!!!}

I've also been WALKING DAILY!!!
My sweet homeschooler, Hannah, really wanted a treadmill for fitness, so she got one with her homeschool funds...& then got a paper route for 3 days a week! (which I've been trying to do with her, but it's been 20 below, & my body doesn't seem to function in that kind of cold! It's supposed to warm up soon, though, & then I will each time!)
I've been a little grieved over the weight I re-gained between the end of November & about a week or so ago, but am not letting it deter me from pressing on & getting my focus back on reaching towards my goals!
AUGH! I just dumped half a blender full of coconut water all over the carpet!!!
& I was craving it sooooo much!!!!
Ok, I've calmed down now...*sigh*...
Time to go for a treadmill walk, & figure out what else I can put in my smoothie...
...One day at a time, sweet Jesus!!!

December 21, 2008

Sick'n'tired of bein' sick'n'tired...

I've once more been reminded that illness actually sometimes has many gifts to offer...each day, I see another reason God allowed us to be sick like we've been, {though I also see what brought it on, in both the physical & spiritual realm.}
I've had to let go of numerous plans & goals for the holiday season that Hannah & I had...(she's sick now, like I was...this hasn't been our typical 2 or 3 day cold, or bout with the flu, but eight or nine days of being totally wiped out!)... of the things let go of being that the gifts we're giving to our family, friends, & church family were all going to be homemade......some are, but not most......ministry opportunities that were on our hearts, but unable to be fulfilled...
...even our raw treats (rawnog, hot chocolate, & desserts) party has had to be cancelled...
...but the blessing has been that my focus has been 100% zeroed in on what is important, eternally!
I've been able to spend so much more time in sweet communion with the Father, & He's made clear that there are things coming that most are not prepared for, & changes coming many will find impossible to handle without abiding in Him...
...& my NEED for my health to dramatically improve quickly has been heavy on my heart, as God has been revealing the REASONS it is crucial!!!
So, once more, the extraneous is just naturally falling away...& what clings is being peeled off, layer by layer. Once more, priorities are being re-focussed, & I'm hyper-aware of the calling on my life, & the time that is approaching rapidly to walk in it as an overcomer, no matter what goes on around me!
Days of wonder, days of awe......worth all we've been through, & then some!
Our God IS an AWESOME God!!!!
May He reveal more of Himself & His will for your life during this season that His coming to earth is celebrated......Remember, HE IS COMING AGAIN!!!!!
(& I believe it will be sooner than many expect!!!)
People, get ready!!!!
...& my favorite version, by one of my favorite singers...
(Worth taking the time to listen to, I promise!
Especially her version of Somewhere Over The Rainbow", found here:

So right now, my priorities are to get back to 100% raw, get Hannah better, & put our house back together!
My best friend I haven't been able to see for almost 9 years may be coming to visit this week!

December 02, 2008

An Exciting, & Yet Dissapointing Night...

Sorry I haven't been posting much lately, I've been sewing like crazy, preparing for Hannah's homeschool group's Presentation night/Craft sale (which took place last night!)......& we've been preparing a song that we sang...
the dissapointment was that NOT ONE BAG SOLD...hardly anyone bought ANYTHING from ANYONE, everyone was too busy visiting, & preparing for their performances...
I did do a little bartering, to support the young artists, (knitting, jewelery) & let Hannah pick out some birthday presents (a much-needed hat & scarf, & some jewelery...)
I guess I shouldn't have counted on selling at least a few to have $ for Hannah's birthday party on the 11th...with all the dentist's bill's we've both been incurring, & how behind I am on bills, it looks like the plans she's been tentatively making won't be able to happen now......*sigh*......but I'm just going to lay it down, not fear, & trust God...we still have a week & a bit before then, & a few days before we need to send the invitations.
The EXCITING part of the evening was that we sang together for the first time in public, & though I messed up a few times, no-one really seemed to notice, & it was very well recieved, & seemed to really bless & minister to people...
...suprised a few, too, quite a few told us later that they had no idea we could sing like that, & that Hannah could harmonize so well! (I only discovered that fact recently myself! Lol!)Considering we never made it all the way through the song ONCE before we performed it, & we only actually worked on it a few times, I think we did well...
...we're going to video-tape it & share it here (& maybe on YouTube) soon, but my hand is a wreck right now, numb & sore, & no strength...
...I actually wanted to post it for Thanksgiving, (I wrote it for Thanksgiving years ago) but seeing as that's part of the theme for this challenge, I'll make sure to do it before it ends, at least!
God has confirmed to me through the annointing on it last night, as well as certain comments & responses that this really IS what He's given us to do (well, one of the main things) as He's been repeatedly showing me, but I've been afraid to 'just do it', not sure if it was just MY will, or His for us...
...& I felt I was too old now...& that my weight is too much of a hinderance... person came up to me I'd never met before & said, "You used to do this before, didn't you? You need to get back to it, sharing the gift you've been given..." (few know I used to sing in churches, youth detention centers, even on radio, & TV a few times...)
So I've committed to playing & singing EVERY SINGLE DAY, & teaching Hannah my songs, & to play them as well, (though I'm praying & believing that God will heal my hands...) & I'm going to ask on Freecycle for a cassette tape deck, so I can listen to & sing along with the recording I did in my friend's studio about 15 years ago...
(...I only have it on cassette they make an affordable machine that can take stuff on tapes & put it on a CD?)
...& how am I doing with raw? On the days I exercise, 100% is no problem...on the days I don', definately having problem staying that's something else I'm COMMITTED to do EVERY SINGLE DAY, (Exercise at LEAST half an hour, & work up a sweat!) cuz in order for my health to improve, I NEED to stay 100%...
(anything less feels like I'm going backwards, in my body, on a cellular level...I still have a LOT of healing to do!)
The other dissapointing thing about last night is, I was quite self-conscious of my weight (there were easily 100 people there, many I didn't know...) & it hindered me from being able to totally get in the spirit...I can't even hold the guitar properly cuz of it!
So I know that shedding MORE is necessary before I can really enter into doing this the way it's meant to be done...
Time to go take & post pics now of all the new stuff I've been making on my Etsy store site...I didn't yet cuz I was hoping to sell most or ALL of it last night...
...I'm such a dreamer sometimes...(one of my best, & worst qualities! *grin*)
As always, I covet your prayers!

November 25, 2008

~Challenged by the Challenges~

Lately, my dear readers, I've been challenged by numerous things:
(aside from the 40 day challenge I'm currently doing at RawFu!)
~A messed up sleep schedule, (couldn't sleep till dawn, having to get up on 4 or 5 hours sleep too often) & all the FM symptoms returning with the exhaustion...
~Dental problems: Getting a tooth pulled, fighting infection off in the hole that it left, & having two other half done root canals acting up, but I have no more dental coverage until the new year, so can do nothing about them, & am praying I don't lose the teeth because of that!
~ Major financial challenges (big dental bills for both Hannah & I, behind on other bills, & her birthdays fast approaching!) & though I totally trust God to provide, & my bags are starting to sell, ...still, it's been adding to the stress levels affecting me...
(I've been doing a major sewing marathon for many weeks now, preparing things to sell, which has given me tennis elbow, & aggrevated my carpal tunnel syndrome in both wrists...but it's been worth it, if it helps me be able to throw Hannah the Birthday party she's wanting & already planning, & gets us through the holidays!)
These challenges have sometimes affected my ability to stay raw, mainly due to having to rely on the food bank to keep food on the table numerous times the past few months, & not being able to afford the things that help me stay raw...(I'm not reacting to stress by going back to cooked/junk food anymore, at least!)...
...BUT I AM an overcomer!!! & I will NOT be overcome by ANY of this!!!
I will NOT allow these challenges to keep me from progressing in continuing to improve my health so I can live the life I was created to live!
The weight is coming off again, slowly but surely, & the nights I sleep well, & sleep early, the improvements in my pain levels & ability to be on my feet come rapidly, so I'm doing all I can to keep it turned around...(I've been getting up at 7 or 7:30 the last 2 days again, & am determined to continue!)
I appreciate all of your support, encouragement, & faith in my ability to do this, to reach my goals & regain my health, & most of all, I request, need & count on your prayers!!!
Please forgive me for not posting more frequently, I've had little time online, & my wrists can only type so much, but I'll keep returning, & sharing my progress with you all!
{& I'm praying for you, too!}
& now, I just have one more thing to share this morning with you...
...Please Allow the challenges to challenge you!!!
Don't allow yourself to be overcome by them, but be an overcomer!

John 16:33These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I (Jesus!) have overcome the world.

Romans 12:21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.

1 John 4:4 Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.

1 John 5:4 For whatsoever is born of God overcomes the world: and this is the victory that overcomes the world, even our faith.

1 John 5:5 Who is he that overcomes the world, but he that believeth that Jesus is the Son of God?

Revelation 2:7 He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches; To him that overcomes will I give to eat of the tree of life, which is in the midst of the paradise of God.

Revelation 2:17 He that hath an ear, let him hear what the Spirit saith unto the churches; To him that overcomes will I give to eat of the hidden manna, and will give him a white stone, and in the stone a new name written, which no man knoweth saving he that receiveth it.

Revelation 2:26 And he that overcomes, and keepeth my works unto the end, to him will I give power over the nations...

Revelation 3:5 He that overcomes, the same shall be clothed in white raiment; and I will not blot out his name out of the book of life, but I will confess his name before my Father, and before his angels.

Revelation 3:12 Him that overcomes I will make a pillar in the temple of my God, and he shall go no more out: and I will write upon him the name of my God, and the name of the city of my God, which is new Jerusalem, which cometh down out of heaven from my God: and I will write upon him my new name!!!

WOW! Reading all those incredible verses just FILLS my spirit with such fervent desire to be an overcomer, even knowing that, in myself, I can do nothing, but also, that I CAN do ALL things THROUGH CHRIST who gives me strength!!!
Of course, the context is spiritually overcoming, but I believe that in ALL areas of our lives, we are either overcomers, or we are overcome...& that He is there to help ALL who call upon His name, in any & EVERY area of our lives!!!

These verses have been cut'n'pasted from here:
{I love this site for searching out the truths found in God's Word!}
So have an overcoming, joyful, FABRAWLICIOUS day!!! (YES, I mean YOU!!!)
& please keep me in your prayers...
...& let me know if there's anything I can pray for you about!
{& don'tcha just love how, when I BOLD things, they go PINK??!!??}

November 10, 2008

From One Challenge to Another!

Well, the 100 day RawFu challenge is's been a time of learning, growing, changing...'s been a time of gentle rawstoration, & a time of perseverance...
I've learned that I must be led by the Holy Spirit, & seek Him for guidance & wisdom in how to do this each & every day! When I do, my healing unfolds....when I don't, it slows, even stagnates, & reverses~
Oh, how I need Him!!!
So what's next, you ask? Well, the next mini challenge begins November 15th, & goes until December 24th...& then, another 100 day challenge begins on January 1st! Will you come join me?
Being there has definately contributed to my progress, (even though I didn't reach ALL my goals over the 100 days, I did let go of 29 more pounds, & began to understand how to do raw in the way that works for me, & that is invaluable! There's a wealth of info, insight, support, & fellowship available, especially for those who reach out & dive in with both feet!
I've been trying to remain 100% raw sinse my trip, & do good for most of the day, but am sometimes struggling in the evenings, missing the FULL feeling of sad food, like I just can't eat enough raw food to fill me up, but I am determined to return to 100% NOW, because I miss how I feel when I am! & I NEED to be again, it's affecting my life, my energy, my sleep patterns NOT to be 100%!
The truth is, for social reasons, I wish sometimes that high raw worked for me but it just doesn't... here I go again, pressing on, determined to get & STAY 100% again! & my goal is not just to stay 100% during the challenge, but to accomplish what I set out to do last year, one FULL YEAR STRAIGHT of 100% raw!!! & I will begin counting as soon as I am consistant!
I also intend to do some fasting/detox before the next 100 day challenge, & hopefully some juice feasting, as well~
My next goal is to be under 300lbs before this year ends! I realize that'll mean shedding more weight between now & then than I lost the whole challenge, but that's because I regained, TWICE, from breaking raw, otherwise, I know it WILL go fast, if I increase my movement & STAY 100%!
SO, here I go again!
Come join me!

October 30, 2008

~Finally back where I was!!!~

Hi, I'm back, finally! {Anybody still checkin' in??}
I'm so sorry I've been sooooooo sporatic lately, but that's gonna change, starting NOW!
Even if I just write a line or two, I'll be posting a new post at least every other day!
Actually, my goal is every day, but I'm gonna give myself a little leeway to get back into the swing of things, after the sewing marathon I've been doing, getting ready to set up my Etsy site to sell my quilted handmade bags & purses! {I have about 20 more almost done, ready to post!}
Here's where I also post them...

{come check 'em out, I'd love your input! & who knows, maybe you'll fall in love with one, & want to adopt it!}
Anyways, after my 2 week foray back into the cooked world, while at my sister's, & gaining back 14 pounds it took forever to lose (& now lose again!) I'm FINALLY back where I was before I left, at 340 lbs...
...actually, I HAD been down to 333 for about ten minutes, but it had been slowly creeping back up as I stopped moving enough, & was eating too many nuts, & other fats.
( I think I also had to mentally adjust...NOW I feel much more ready to go to the next level, for various reasons...)
One of my dear readers just sent me a very encouraging note about incorporating more physical exercise in my life as a weight loss tool, regardless of what I'm eating, or not eating, just as the Holy Spirit began whispering to me about falling back into my old ways of not moving nearly enough, because of how the weight I'd re-gained slowed me down! (Thank-you for caring & sharing that with me!)
So I've begun to PUSH myself again, getting up more often, moving more, not asking Hannah to do things I should be doing (going up the stairs & outside to get the mail, take out the garbage, etc.) & getting back to my daily exercise session, whether I get outside that day or not!
In fact, I've given myself a final FULL SPEED AHEAD ten day challenge, to complete this RawFu 100 day challenge, to see if I can push myself harder than ever before, & release 10 more pounds before this challenge is done!
So would you like to join me? What can YOU accomplish in ten days???
Please share your goals with me, let's hold each other accountable!!!
Also, I've been sewing so much, my house looks like a tornado hit it in the middle of a hurricane!
For example, here's my sewing area...

{There is a sewing table area behind the couch where my sewing stuff has been but it has NOT been used, except as a dumping ground, & is totally unorganized, & is currently driving me crazy!}
So I've decided that every single day (aside from the regular 1 hour of exercise I'm setting as a goal to fit into EVERY day!) I'm going to put on my favorite music & sing & dance as I do an aerobic cleaning session on my messes at least 3 times a day, until I'm breathless each time! I need to have my house ready for hospitality again, the Lord's been putting it on my heart to open it up for a women's Bible study soon~
So that's what I've been up to....what about you???

October 20, 2008

~Dealing With the Aftermath of Breaking Raw~

Believe me when I tell you, folks, that RAW is BEST!!! & once your body has detoxed at least to some degree, going back to cooked/processed/meat & dairy is REALLY not fun AT ALL!
I thought I'd come back home, & jump right back into raw...I got some produce, & have been eating lots of it, but I've been really having cravings, & struggling against a new lackadaisical attitude that is really proving to be a battle to crucify!
When I was there, I made choices, but now, I feel like I'm almost totally in bondage again... ...but I know that I just need to jump back in, or ease back in, or whatever it takes, & get back to 100% raw ASAP!
That's when I feel ALIVE! That's when I can tell I'm healing on a cellular level, & feel better by the day...& I miss that, I miss all the energy that comes with that, the lack of pain & achiness, the much more vivacious emotional state, & however long it takes me to get back to that, I'm headin' there again, & am going to persevere!
So don't give up on me, K? I'm not giving up, I'm pressin' on, one day at a time!
& I'm healing, a little each day, from the damage done from my 2 weeks of eating stuff I knew I shouldn't be... retrospect,there was an illusion of 'freedom' to not be 100% raw for awhile, to not have to plan ahead, or chop, chop, chop, or budget for enough produce to get through, & not eat when & what others were eating, especially when eating out...& it was great to not have to plan & preapre every meal!...
...but the so-called freedom led to bondage to old habits, taste preferences from the past, & POWERFUL cravings that have gripped me again, & it soooo was NOT worth it!
I AM a Raw Foodist, & I know it's what I'm meant to be!!!